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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26674195">Thought It Was Obvious</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lukeinallhisglory/pseuds/lukeinallhisglory'>lukeinallhisglory</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Cashton [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>5 Seconds of Summer (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys Kissing, Friends to Lovers, I've been doing this for like 7 years and I still don't know how to tag, M/M, Sexual Tension</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:13:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,451</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26674195</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lukeinallhisglory/pseuds/lukeinallhisglory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Calum has been in love with Ashton so long he forgot it might be mutual</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Calum Hood/Ashton Irwin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Cashton [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/563450</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Thought It Was Obvious</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello.  It's been SUCH a long time since I've written anything about the two of them, but I've been playing around with this one for a while so I hope you like it.  Not a lot else to say :)</p><p>Title from "IN A DREAM" by Troye Sivan (Okay, I mostly don't comment on the song choice, but Troye's EP is so painful and raw and ow but so beautiful and magical at the same time)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I collapsed face-first onto the bed as soon as we walked into the hotel room, exhaustion washing over me instantly.  I felt the mattress sink next to me and Ashton’s warm hand slid against my waist and across my back.  “Oh, hi,” I chuckled, turning to face him. </p><p>“I’m gonna go shower in a minute, just want to lie here with you for a second.”  The all too familiar feeling of wanting to kiss him prickled up my neck, hot shame just behind it.  I wrenched my gaze away from his eyes, our proximity not lost on me. </p><p>“Don’t start what you can’t finish,” I grinned, pushing my face into his neck, now half on top of him.  The barely touching had been too overwhelming, being fully pressed together somehow easier.  His fingers threaded into my hair almost automatically. </p><p>“What does that mean?” Ashton asked, and his voice was edged with something.  I realized how it had sounded now and the realization sent embarrassed heat flooding to my cheeks even as a sick part of me hoped it wasn’t lost on him.  I felt his eyes on me like he was waiting for me to look up at him, but I didn’t want to see his expression right now.  I was afraid I would look into his annoyingly beautiful eyes and blurt out something stupid like <em>I’m in love with you</em>.  Which, to be fair, was absolutely true, but if he didn’t already know that by now there was no reason that he ever should. </p><p>“Sleep here,” I said gently, muffled by his skin. </p><p>“Impossible to sleep with a starfish,” Ashton quipped.  Was he deflecting or was I reading too much into it?  Being around him made me feel insane and exposed like slicing my chest open to hand him my still-beating heart.  I bit down on his shoulder where my face was still pressed, just hard enough to convey annoyance.  “Ow, fuck, did you just bite me?”</p><p>“Might’ve.”</p><p>“Calum, you are a child.”  Fondness bled into the words, and I looked up to see that he was in fact grinning just as I had thought.  That look was what did it, all those years ago and even now. </p><p>“Go take your shower, traitor.”</p><p>“Didn’t know you felt that strongly about it,” Ashton teased, pinching the exposed skin of my waist where my shirt had ridden up. </p><p>“Well, I do,” I mumbled, and it didn’t really mean anything, but it felt so much like a confession that I felt the anxiety of it tightening in my chest. </p><p>Versions of this moment played out in my mind, ones where I spilled my soul, told him everything I was thinking, even pressed in the two inches it would take for us to be kissing.  I was dangerously close to this level of reckless desperation.  When it came to Ashton, I always had been.  I didn’t do any of those things, though, and then Ashton squeezed my hips to tell me to let him up and I moved off of him. </p><p>When he came out of the shower, I was just on the verge of being asleep.  I heard the shuffling of him swapping his towel for clothing, and I fought the urge to turn over to look at him.  In another universe, a universe where Ashton isn’t <em>Ashton</em>, he would have just gone to sleep in his own bed.  This Ashton, <em>my Ashton</em>, climbed into bed next to me, hand going immediately to my waist.  I opened my eyes to his gorgeous face three inches from mine, soft eyes peering back at me.  The quiet affection of this moment sent shivers down my spine, and I felt it bleeding all the way down to my fingertips.  “Turn around,” I murmured, running my hand up his outstretched arm.  I swear I saw a reaction in his face to the sleepy roughness of my voice, but I couldn’t be sure.  He did as I said, going easy as I wrapped my arm around his waist and hooked one leg over his. </p><p>“Ash?” I whispered.</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“I’m sorry I bit you.”  I kissed his shoulder, the action feeling intensely intimate even though it was through his t-shirt. </p><p>“Just go to sleep, sweetheart,” he chuckled.  My heart constricted at the pet name, and there it was again, always the same feeling of wishing he would kiss me. </p><p>-[]-</p><p>When I woke up Ashton was up and dressed, offering me breakfast that he’d already gone out to get.  I sat up, stretching.  “What’s all this for?”  I took the food from him and he set the coffee down on the end table, climbing back into bed to sit next to me. </p><p>“I don’t really know exactly what it was, but to be really honest with you, Cal, I felt like we were fighting last night.”</p><p>“Fighting? About what?” I started to eat the sandwich he’d brought me, my focus split, so I missed the raw edge to his behavior, the heaviness of his gaze on me. </p><p>“I don’t know, but when I woke up, I felt like I needed to make something up to you.”</p><p>“You didn’t have anything to make up for,” I said softly, and I looked up at him to find him much more distraught than I had thought.  I put my food aside.  “You’re this upset over it, or is there something else on your mind?” I asked, my hand skimming up his arm to squeeze at his shoulder. </p><p>He looked like he was about to cry, and I felt it pushing in against my lungs.  If I didn’t do something to break this moment, I was going to be an idiot and kiss him.  “I don’t know,” he said again.  “Am I crazy or was there something going on last night?”</p><p>I didn’t know how to respond to that since the answer was, <em>I was thinking about kissing you, and I still am.  </em>“Like what?” I said, gutless.  I pulled my hand away, the contact too charged. </p><p>Ashton’s eyes flitted to my mouth.  I was sure of it this time.  The thought rushed over me, heady and terrifying.  I waited for him to look away, speak, do something that would break the tension, but he was still looking.  He shifted closer, taking my chin between his fingers and kissing me gently.  The feeling was like being electrified and I shot backward, away from him.  “Fuck, I’m sorry,” he let out before I could say anything.  He was already running away from me, off the bed, and across the room. </p><p>“Ash, stop,” I called after him.  He did as I said, looking embarrassed and guilty, all of the things I constantly felt around him for all the same reasons.  “How long have you…?” I didn’t have it in me to finish the sentence, <em>wanted to kiss me, liked me, loved me?</em></p><p>“I don’t know, Cal.  Forever?”  He sat on the end of the abandoned bed, a picture of confusion and defeat. </p><p>I got out of bed, thankful that I was as clothed as I was considering I had just woken up.  Ashton watched me carefully as I crouched in front of him, hands on his thighs. He let his legs fall open and I shifted in closer.  “I was just surprised, but I think about kissing you fifty times a day.  I didn’t think you’d want me to.”</p><p>“You do?” </p><p>“Yeah, love, I do.”  I dropped my head into his lap, and he brought one hand up to push inside the neck of my t-shirt, sweeping up and down my spine.  Shivers ran down my back and I relaxed into the touch even as I felt heat blooming in my stomach. </p><p>Something about this interaction was so comfortably supercharged with sexual tension in a way that nothing else had ever been.  When I lifted my head to look at him, my heart started pounding because I could see in his eyes what he was probably seeing in mine.  I felt like I was going to die if I didn’t get my mouth back on his.  I pushed myself up by his thighs, still between his legs, and I pressed in to kiss him as he leaned down to meet me.  He brought both of his hands up to the back of my neck and dragged me in, and there was sort of nowhere else for the momentum to go but for us to fall back, and me to end up on top of him. </p><p>I climbed further over him, so I was straddling his waist.  His hands ended up on my hips as he pushed his tongue into my mouth, and I swear my heart stopped beating altogether.  My body’s reaction to that did not go unnoticed, his fingers gripping into my hips harder, guiding me against him.  I couldn’t tell which one of us was really in control if either of us even was. </p><p>“Ash,” I groaned.  “Before I forget how to speak, we need to talk about this.”</p><p>“Ok, ok, you’re right,” he fell back to lie flat on the bed and I kept my perch on his waist, my hands on his chest.  I was trying very hard not to picture an only slightly different scenario with the same positioning.  I also tried not to think about the fact that I could feel the hard bulge of him against my ass, even through his jeans, and that meant he could definitely feel me through my underwear against his stomach. </p><p>“You should know that I’m in love with you, like really properly in love with you, which I’m sure if you think about, you’ll realize you always knew.”</p><p>“<em>Oh</em>,” he let out.  And that just wasn’t what I wanted to hear, no matter how much I told myself that it didn’t mean anything. </p><p>My face burned with embarrassment.  “I know this might be a lot to process.  I can get off of you if you want.”  I added finally, desperate for him to say anything else. </p><p>“Don’t,” Ashton murmured, his hands running up and down my arms lightly, setting my skin on fire.  I groaned and Ashton bit his lip.  “Feel good?”  My hips skipped forward without my consent, everything too much and not enough at the same time.  It was absolutely nowhere near what I’d been hoping to hear, but I could feel it, heavy under my skin, that he wasn’t going to say it back.  It was up to me to decide if I wanted to find that our for sure. </p><p>“Fuck, you can’t say things like that.” I panted, knuckles white in the fabric of his shirt.</p><p>“Sorry,” he gripped my waist, lifting me a little bit so he could shift to sit up underneath me.  I let my eyes fall shut as I tried and failed to suppress the groan that was produced from the grazing of his hips against mine.  “Look at me,” he pressed a kiss to my shoulder, his eyes blazing.  “You’re the only person I think about.”</p><p>Even in this position that made me blush, and he pressed a kiss to my shoulder a few inches closer in towards my neck.  “Ash, you’ve got to tone down the sexy rasp if you want to get through this conversation,” I murmured, my breath stuttering.</p><p>“What I mean is, I’m just as in this as you are,” he grinned at me.  “You’re not going to scare me away by telling me you love me.”  The flood of relief at hearing that was actually surprising.</p><p>“That’s good to hear.”</p><p>“Anything else you want to say?” Dozens of things came to mind, but that heaviness was still buried deep in my skin and I wasn’t prepared to press any further.  He half kissed, half bit at my neck, now.</p><p>“I think that’s it,” I mumbled. </p><p>“Great,” he chuckled, fully biting at my jaw. </p><p>I wrapped both arms around his shoulders and let him push me back, so he was on top of me now.  He kissed me again, less sweet this time, sucking harshly on my bottom lip.  “Can I take this off?” I panted, pulling at his shirt.  He groaned, tugging it off and tossing it on the floor.  He sat back a few inches, running his fingers through my hair, pushing it back from my forehead.  “Can I touch you?” I asked softly. </p><p>“Yeah, please,” he groaned, nodded quickly, hips pushing forward.  I reached down between us and started undoing his belt, popping the button of his jeans and pushing my hand inside his boxers.  He gasped at the contact, his hips pushing forward against my hand.  “Fuck, not wasting any time, are you?”</p><p>I smiled, watching his face as I continued.  “Just tell me if you want me to stop.”  He groaned heavily as I picked up the pace a little bit.  He pushed his face into my neck, sucking on my throat as he continued to fuck into my fist.  “Take off your pants, I want to see everything.”</p><p>I felt him twitch in my hand at that, and he kissed me bruisingly again before climbing off of me to rid himself of his jeans and boxers.  As he moved back in to kiss me, fully naked now, I realized how clothed I was in comparison.  He settled between my legs again, kissing a line up my stomach starting from where my underwear hit low on my hips, his head basically inside my shirt.  “Can I see you, too?” he asked softly.  I nodded quickly and pulled it off as he dragged my underwear down my thighs. </p><p>I felt good under his gaze, safe and wanted.  In all honesty, I had pictured us like this before, but I had never really thought about how good it would feel to be like this with someone who is an expert on me.  It brought up a well of emotions in me, just the simple fact that I had nothing to prove to him, nothing to hide, he already knew.  And none of it scared him, which is something that I hadn’t ever really believed was possible. </p><p>I had always thought that if this did ever happen, we would be obscenely drunk.  Evidently, we were actually capable of healthier communication than I had originally anticipated, which I suspected was mostly Ashton’s doing.  I also think that as much as my ego would like to say otherwise, the sex itself only benefitted from our sobriety.  And probably the only reason it had taken us this long was that I was fundamentally risk-averse when it came to things that matter and losing him felt like the highest risk of anything. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! I am very, very open to questions, comments, concerns--I would love to hear from you.  Otherwise, just have a lovely day.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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